I've been in the workforce now for many years.
Since my middle school days, I've become particularly sensitive and often magnify small things infinitely, leaving myself in a state of anxiety and irritation.
I get extra concerned about certain topics and tend to overthink them.
When interacting with my boyfriend, I was always rambling and would ask him questions over and over again until he reassured me and I could feel a little more at ease.
I have thought about seeing a counselor, but I feel that the profession is of varying standards, and I am reluctant to disclose personal matters to others, and I am also worried that the counselor's thoughtless words will irritate me.
In front of others, I had to pretend to be cheerful and generous and force a smile.
I always feel like I can't find a way out and life is confusing.
I have improved in some ways over the years, but I still have a lot of pain inside that I can't let go of.
My boyfriend was the only person I confided in, but after his family's accident, he became grumpy and would yell, drop things, and lose patience with me, which made my state even worse.
I feel like I'm getting low self-esteem and while I don't want to give up on life, I still desire to get better, I just can't find a way to do it.
Inside, there is despair and no hope in sight.
Hello, dear friend:
?
✨ From your description, I can deeply feel your sensitivity and anxiety. In your daily life, an unintentional word from someone else may be circling around in your mind over and over again, but you don't know how to say it, keeping that uneasiness pent up.
When communicating with your boyfriend, his words tend to make you "think too much", but fortunately, by asking questions, he was able to explain clearly, soothe your emotions, and let you slowly calm down. Unfortunately, later he had a family accident, emotions out of control, become irritable, was your only dependence, but now can not patiently listen, and even said hurtful words, which makes the already sensitive and inferiority complex you even more self-confidence.
✨ But in this process, I saw your efforts and persistence, you are trying various ways to improve yourself, although the effect is not as expected, but you did not give up, this courage deserves recognition.
? Looking back on your journey, I'm curious:
1. You mentioned that you "became unusually sensitive starting in middle school", what exactly happened in middle school? How did you react at that time? How did that incident make you feel?
2、If you face yourself in junior high school, what do you want to say or do to that little girl to comfort her?
?
✨ Here I would like to recommend a book, "High Sensitivity is a Gift," which will help you discover the strengths behind your sensitivity, embrace your delicate inner self, and see sensitive traits in a new light.
Anxiety over what others say often stems from a lack of self-acceptance, and the look, tone or words of others tend to make you feel "unloved". But honey, when you start to love yourself, accept yourself, and clarify your self-worth, the influence of the outside world will gradually diminish. When you are strong inside, you don't have to pretend to be "big-headed" anymore, and being sensitive and delicate can be part of your charm ????????
?The world and I have always loved you~
